From Cosmopolitan · Rachel Varina · · 1m 20s
Maybe It’s Time to Date Outside Your Type
Your type isn't a compatibility test, redefine what matters for lasting love.
In brief
Your type isn't a compatibility test, redefine what matters for lasting love. Having a type doesn't guarantee happiness; focus on shared values and emotional connection instead of arbitrary traits. Originally reported by Cosmopolitan.
Alexa's Type
Alexa's type was beautiful but dumb as a rock, requiring at least six feet tall partners.
“Beautiful but dumb as a rock”
Alexa's Marriage
Alexa married a 5'10" man after ten years of dating exclusively six-foot-tall fraternity guys.
“5'10"”
Type vs. Preference
Having a type is fine, but letting it make decisions for you is where things get stupid.
“where things get *checks notes* stupid”
Type Isn't Compatibility
A type is a collection of qualities learned to associate with desire, not genuine compatibility.
“A 'type' is usually a collection of qualities a person has learned to associate with desire”
Past Relationships
Past relationships can reinforce attraction to a familiar 'type', making it feel natural over time.
“past relationships can reinforce our attraction to a certain 'type'”
Chemistry Isn't Instruction
Chemistry is information but not instruction, familiarity can create sparks without compatibility.
“Chemistry is information, but it is not always instruction”
Attraction vs. Type
Not your type doesn't mean you're not attracted to them, attraction can grow through emotional intimacy.
“Not my type is not the same thing as I'm not attracted to them”
Height Doesn't Matter
The height that seemed nonnegotiable when swiping on Hinge probably matters less when you're older.
“The height that seemed nonnegotiable when you were swiping on Hinge”
What Matters Most
Do they respect you? Do they make you feel valued? Can you build a life together?
“Do you actually like being around this person? Do they respect you? Do you respect them?”
Alexa's Realization
Alexa realized two inches weren't actually one of her standards after marrying a 5'10" man.
“two inches weren't actually one of them”
The key point
Having a type doesn't guarantee happiness; focus on shared values and emotional connection instead of arbitrary traits.
