Most couples fight about money

Seven out of ten married or cohabiting couples argue about finances at least once a year, and three out of four say financial decisions cause relationship tension.

One person controlling everything is risky

When one partner knows and controls all finances, it's a solo burden while you're together and a potential crisis if you break up, face illness, death, or job loss.

Financial habits are acts of love

Good financial habits including organization and transparency aren't about mistrust. They ensure both people understand their shared financial life and can step in if something suddenly changes.

Read before you sign anything

Both partners should review major financial documents together, including tax returns, investment and retirement account paperwork, insurance policies and estate planning documents.

“Never sign something you haven't discussed and reviewed together.”

Have regular money meetings

Don't wait for a crisis to talk about money. Check in monthly or quarterly about cash flow, upcoming expenses, savings, investments, debt, goals and financial stress.

Know where everything is

Both partners should know where accounts are held, how passwords are managed, where documents are stored and how to reach your financial professional, accountant and attorney.

Understand your household numbers

Even if one person manages day-to-day finances, both partners should understand income, spending, housing costs, debt, emergency savings, retirement savings and net worth.

Show up for financial meetings

Both partners should attend meetings with financial advisers, CPAs, estate attorneys and insurance professionals whenever possible to prevent one person from becoming the sole holder of important relationships.

Be honest about spending and debt

Financial transparency doesn't mean asking permission for every purchase, but hidden accounts, debt or financial problems can seriously damage a relationship. Agree on what decisions warrant a conversation.

Review beneficiaries and estate plans

Check beneficiaries, powers of attorney, healthcare directives, guardianship plans, trusts and wills regularly. Life changes, and documents need to keep up with your current situation.

Learn together without judgment

There should be no "you wouldn't understand" when it comes to money. One person might love investing more, but both partners deserve knowledge, visibility and confidence to ask questions.

Trade places occasionally

If one person usually pays bills, let the other do it sometimes. Both should know how to transfer money, access online banking and handle the financial tasks that keep your household running.

“One person might do most of the driving, but both should know how to operate the car.”