Men avoid treatment for depression

One in 10 men experience depression or anxiety, but only half ever get treatment. The stigma of talking about mental health still holds strong.

Trained to believe we're strong

Men are taught that depression isn't part of their experience. If they were tough enough, they wouldn't feel this way.

“We've all been trained to believe that we have to be strong and that depression is not part of our experience.”

Men show different symptoms

While men and women share some depressive symptoms like fatigue, men tend to exhibit certain behaviors more often.

Depression gets acted out

Men with depression often don't look sad. They show anger, irritability, increased drinking, or engage in high-adrenaline behaviors instead.

Escapism is the telltale sign

Men use harmless activities like video games, sports, or hobbies to excess. These become ways to avoid confronting emotional pain.

“Rather than being enjoyed in themselves, these behaviors become ways for men to avoid confronting their emotional pain.”

Men double down on activities

Instead of giving up preferred activities, men are more likely to double down on things they think will make them feel better.

Even productivity can be hiding

Working long hours at the office or gym can function as a hiding place. Staying busy enough not to notice feelings is real.

“I see less 'escaping feelings' and more 'staying busy enough not to notice them.'”

Diagnosed at half the rate

Men are diagnosed with depression at half the rate of women. Stigma, masculinity norms, and limited screening tools all play a role.

Screening tools miss male symptoms

Many tools are less likely to identify depression in men, especially when they show irritability or escapism instead of sadness.

Men don't self-refer to therapy

Most men in therapy have been given ultimatums in marriages or have work issues. They say they're exhausted, not depressed.

“Men don't come in saying 'I'm depressed.' They say 'I'm exhausted,' 'I have no patience,' 'I don't enjoy anything anymore.'”

How to approach a struggling man

Use observation without confrontation. Say things like 'You don't seem like yourself' or 'I noticed you stopped going to your golf game.'

Side-by-side conversations work best

Going for a walk or doing an activity together helps men open up more than an intervention-style sit-down conversation.