From Slate Magazine · Rich Juzwiak · · 50s
Homeschooled Dating Struggles
Homeschooled person seeks consistent partners but attracts flaky neurodivergent friends.
In brief
Homeschooled person seeks consistent partners but attracts flaky neurodivergent friends. Homeschooled person finds consistent partners by being generous with time and support. Originally reported by Slate Magazine.
Homeschooled dating pattern
Homeschooled person describes social skills progress but attracts flaky neurodivergent friends.
“I was homeschooled K-12, and while I have made huge progress in the subsequent years in developing social skills”
Flaky relationships
Friends and partners disappear for long stretches without warning due to social overwhelm.
“They are almost always frankly, flakey, fellow-neurodivergent people who will disappear for long stretches without warning”
Consistency struggle
Homeschooled person needs consistent partners but consistent people don’t seem to be attracted to them.
“I need consistency. However, consistent people don’t seem to be attracted to me.”
Neurodivergent dynamics
Neurodivergent people often disappear due to social overwhelm, but return after long periods.
“I’ve had many experiences where I thought I’d alienated them and they gave up on me, and then eight months later, I get a text”
Advice response
Slate’s advice columnist says flakiness is common and offers consistency as a solution.
“Don’t blame yourself for other people’s flakiness. We live in a flaky world.”
Relationship advice
Be consistent and generous with time to attract partners who value your space.
“Be the consistency that you wish to receive. Let people fade out when they need to, and accept their fade back in with warmth.”
What happens next
Homeschooled person continues being generous with time and support to attract consistent partners.
“Keep being you, keep being generous with your time and support. Believe that someone will properly appreciate it eventually.”
The headline
Homeschooled person finds consistent partners by being generous with time and support.
