# 30 Foreplay Ideas to Seriously Heat Things Up > Sex experts share 30 ways to make foreplay the main event, not just a prelude to penetrative sex. - Title: 30 Foreplay Ideas to Seriously Heat Things Up · Cosmopolitan - Summary: Sex experts share 30 ways to make foreplay the main event, not just a prelude to penetrative sex. Sex experts recommend 30 foreplay ideas to build desire… - Keywords: foreplay, sex experts, intimacy, sexual health, relationship advice, couple activities, sexual pleasure, relationship tips, sexual communication, body awareness, Ideas, Seriously - Source: Cosmopolitan — https://sex.cosmopolitan.com/pleasure/a74134755/sex-foreplay-ideas - Author: Rachel Varina - Published: 2026-10-19T21:20:34+00:00 - Read time: 2 min - Topics: foreplay, sex experts, intimacy, sexual health, relationship advice, couple activities, sexual pleasure, relationship tips, sexual communication, body awareness ## What Is Foreplay? Foreplay is the art of physically and emotionally connecting with your partner to create sexual desire, arousal, and intimacy together. > Foreplay is the art of physically and emotionally connecting with your partner in order to create sexual desire, arousal, and intimacy together ## Foreplay Isn't Just Physical Many people experience responsive desire, where they don't feel turned on until their body is properly stimulated. > Many people experience what's called 'responsive desire,' says Tara Suwinyattichaiporn, PhD, a Kinsey-certified sexologist and professor of sexual communication. 'They don't necessarily feel turned on until their body is properly stimulated.' ## 30 Foreplay Ideas Sex experts recommend 30 foreplay ideas to build desire, arousal, and intimacy without requiring penetration. > Below, 30 foreplay ideas worth adding to your sexual repertoire. ## Sexting Before Meeting Sexting builds anticipation, especially for people with vaginas who can get wet from the right kind of sexting. > [People with vaginas] can get wet from just the right kind of sexting, says Dr. Tara. ## Extended Makeouts Extended makeouts build oxytocin, spark arousal, and help couples reconnect without pressure to get naked immediately. > Extended make outs build oxytocin, spark arousal, and help couples reconnect, says Dr. Joy. ## Oral Sex as Foreplay Oral sex is a chance to focus on pleasure without making penetration the end goal, and counts as sex on its own. > This is the best way to take turns in bed and really focus on what brings your partner pleasure, says Shaffer. ## Hand Jobs Hand jobs can feel as good as other forms of stimulation with the right technique and plenty of lube. > With the right technique (and plenty of lube), using your hands can feel just as good as other forms of stimulation. ## Fingering and External Touch Fingering and external touch can be enjoyed without needing penetration, using clean hands and lube. > Start with clean hands, trimmed nails, and plenty of lube, then experiment with different pressures, speeds, and movements. ## Nipple Stimulation Nipple stimulation can be enjoyed by people of all genders, with gentle caresses, kisses, or light pinching. > Nipples deserve some love, too. And no, nipple play isn't just for people with breasts. ## Casual Touches Casual, consensual touches throughout the day build anticipation without making a whole production. > Playful touch keeps you attuned to your partner and releases oxytocin, says Dr. Tara. ## Whispering Dirty Whispering dirty phrases builds mental foreplay and can be as important as physical activities. > I want to feel you later, says Dr. Tara. ## Sensual Massage Sensual massage creates heat and connection without pressure, using slow, intentional touch. > Sensual massage, including yoni or prostate massage, can create heat and connection without pressure, says Dr. Tara. ## Sex Toys Sex toys are a boost for foreplay, not a replacement for intimacy, and can be used together. > Sex toys aren't a replacement for intimacy; they're a boost, says Dr. Tara. ## Blindfolded Foreplay Blindfolds add anticipation and focus on sensations without seeing what your partner is doing. > Adding a blindfold to foreplay lets you focus on the sensations of touch, kissing, and teasing without being able to see exactly what your partner is up to. ## Watching Each Other Undress Watching each other undress adds anticipation and attention without requiring physical contact. > You don't need to do a full striptease (unless that's your thing). But slowing down and watching adds a level of anticipation and attention. ## Take Penetration Off the Table Taking penetration off the table can build desire and lead to more fun when you do it. > By taking a certain act off the menu temporarily, you can build desire overall, which not only makes the things you are actively doing more fun but makes it even hotter when you finally do it, says Shaffer. ## Yes/No/Maybe List Creating a yes/no/maybe list helps figure out what you and your partner are actually into. > Each of you makes a list of sexual activities and sorts them into three categories: yes (things you're into or want to try), no (hard limits), and maybe (things you're curious about but aren't ready to commit to). ## Sharing Sexual Fantasies Sharing sexual fantasies can intensify mental arousal and lead to new discoveries. > Verbalizing fantasies intensifies mental arousal, says Dr. Joy. ## Role-Play Role-playing lets you step outside your usual dynamic and explore fantasies. > Role-play lets you step outside your usual dynamic, explore fantasies, and try on a different personality for a little while. ## Light Bondage Light bondage can introduce a new level of anticipation without taking control away. > Playing with different restraints can help you be more present in your body, says Shaffer. ## Key takeaway Sex experts recommend 30 foreplay ideas to build desire, arousal, and intimacy without requiring penetration.