# Choosing solitude is not giving up

> Older people who pull back from company are often resting, not retreating from life.
- Title: Choosing solitude is not giving up · Psychologies | Shortify
- Summary: Older people who pull back from company are often resting, not retreating from life. Solitude late in life can be a repair strategy, not a warning sign, but…
- Keywords: ageing, solitude, caregiving, mental health, psychology, Choosing, giving, Psychologies
- Source: Psychologies — https://psychologies.com/bien-etre/Les-personnes-qui-recherchent-de-plus-en-plus-la-solitude-en-vieillissant-ne-deviennent-pas-forcement-antisociales-elles-ont-souvent-passe-leur-vie-a-faire-passer-les-autres-avant-elles-639108
- Author: Bokhobza Olivia
- Published: 2026-09-13T10:02:04+00:00
- Read time: 1 min
- Topics: ageing, solitude, caregiving, mental health, psychology
## The stereotype is wrong
We picture the bitter old person alone at home. A growing share of seniors are simply choosing more time by themselves, and it has nothing to do with being antisocial.
## More alone, not more anxious
Time spent alone rises with age, partly from fewer social occasions and partly from preference. Older adults show no more social anxiety and no weaker social skills than younger ones.
## What good solitude feels like
Researchers at the University of Haifa interviewed 124 people, including older adults and gerontology professionals. Chosen solitude came out as pleasant, satisfying and meaningful.

> la solitude positive choisie est vécue comme agréable, satisfaisante et porteuse de sens
## Fewer bad feelings alone
A study in The Gerontologist followed over 300 people aged 65 and up. Their solitary moments were linked to fewer negative emotions, especially when their relationships were draining.
## A lifetime of caring leaves a mark
Hu, Larkina and Smith found in 2023 that former caregivers viewed their own ageing more negatively. After decades on other people's needs, they felt the pull to come back to themselves.
## Chosen is not the same as imposed
Solitude that a person picks can be freedom and reconnection with the self. Solitude that lands on someone is a different thing entirely, and the balance between them stays fragile.
## Four questions to ask
Family and friends are the safeguard. Ask the person: do you like being alone, do you still have enough contact, do you feel well or sad, content or cut off?
## Key takeaway

Solitude late in life can be a repair strategy, not a warning sign, but only when the person chose it freely.