# Six phrases that hide what you really feel

> Some of the most ordinary things people say are quiet signals that they are holding everything in.
- Title: Six phrases that hide what you really feel · Psychologies
- Summary: Some of the most ordinary things people say are quiet signals that they are holding everything in. "Ça va" and "je gère" are often not updates, they are…
- Keywords: psychology, emotions, alexithymia, relationships, mental health, Six, phrases, hide, really, feel, Psychologies
- Source: Psychologies — https://psychologies.com/moi/se-connaitre/comportement/Les-personnes-qui-gardent-toujours-tout-pour-elles-utilisent-ces-6-phrases-sans-realiser-ce-quelles-veulent-vraiment-dire-634326
- Author: Ava Skoupsky
- Published: 2026-09-12T21:02:38+00:00
- Read time: 1 min
- Topics: psychology, emotions, alexithymia, relationships, mental health
## Some people can't say it
Sharing a fear, a doubt or a win comes easily to some. For others it feels impossible, so the pain gets buried instead of spoken.
## The six giveaway phrases
"Ça va." "Ce n'est pas si grave." "Je gère." "Laisse tomber, ça va aller." "Je n'ai besoin de personne." "On verra tout ça plus tard."

> "Je n'ai besoin de personne"
## Politeness is the cover story
These lines usually come out to avoid bothering anyone. That intention is kind, but the phrase still works as a defence mechanism.
## Suppression backfires
A 2003 study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found people who suppress emotions express less, feel more negative emotion and report lower wellbeing.
## When feelings have no words
The pattern is linked to alexithymia, a difficulty identifying, understanding and expressing your own emotions. Researchers tie it to weaker emotional regulation.

> Les personnes présentant une alexithymie importante semblent manifester des stratégies de régulation émotionnelle moins efficaces
## Most people like being asked
Positive psychology expert Florence Servan-Schreiber notes that most of us actually enjoy being asked for help. Listening closely can let someone finally put down what they've carried too long.
## Key takeaway

"Ça va" and "je gère" are often not updates, they are shutters coming down. Ask again, gently.