# Student Teacher's Unlikely Request

> A former student teacher faces a confusing request after years of mentoring.
- Title: Student Teacher's Unlikely Request · Slate Magazine | Shortify
- Summary: A former student teacher faces a confusing request after years of mentoring. A former student teacher who mentored a queer teen now faces a relationship…
- Keywords: prudence, student teacher, mentee, queer, college, kiss, power dynamic, middle school, purple state, groomer, Student, Teacher's
- Source: Slate Magazine — https://slate.com/advice/2026/10/dear-prudence-chat-mentee-back-troubling-request.html?via=rss
- Author: Jenée Desmond-Harris, Lizzie O’Leary
- Published: 2026-10-01T16:00:00+00:00
- Read time: 1 min
- Topics: prudence, student teacher, mentee, queer, college, kiss, power dynamic, middle school, purple state, groomer
## Mentor and Student
A student teacher mentored a quiet teen who used their club as a study space after hurting their knee.
## Student's Struggles
Vee, a 17-year-old, shared family divorce, college challenges, and hopelessness with the teacher.
## The Kiss
Vee kissed the teacher when they were 17 and the teacher was 22, causing immediate avoidance.
## Graduation and Distance
Vee graduated college and is thriving, but the teacher now faces a flirty message from their former student.
## Teacher's Confusion
The teacher feels uneasy about pursuing a relationship despite being in middle school now and having a five-year age gap.
## Friends' Divide
The teacher's friends split into 'full-speed ahead' and 'don't touch it with a ten foot pole' groups.
## Purple State Concerns
The teacher works in a 'purple state' and fears being labeled a groomer due to the relationship.
## Expert Advice
Prudie and two experts debate whether the teacher should pursue a relationship with their former student.
## Legal and Ethical Concerns
The relationship is legally possible but risks professional backlash and emotional complications.
## Past Kiss Impact
The teacher's past reaction to the kiss suggests a shift in their feelings about the student.
## Expert Consensus
Experts agree the relationship could end badly and the teacher should avoid it for now.
## Recommended Action
The teacher should keep the relationship in a drawer and focus on being a positive influence without risk.
## Final Advice
The teacher should wait two years before considering a relationship to ensure mutual readiness.
## What Happens Next
The teacher continues mentoring without pursuing a relationship, prioritizing safety and trust.
## Key takeaway

A former student teacher who mentored a queer teen now faces a relationship request despite past power dynamics.