# Why Adult Children Choose Estrangement

> Adult children increasingly sever ties with parents, seeking independence amid shifting family dynamics.
- Title: Why Adult Children Choose Estrangement · Kiplinger | Shortify
- Summary: Adult children increasingly sever ties with parents, seeking independence amid shifting family dynamics. Estrangement between parents and adult children is…
- Keywords: estrangement, parent-child, mental health, family dynamics, boundaries, reconciliation, adult children, parental responsibility, Kiplinger
- Source: Kiplinger — https://kiplinger.com/retirement/why-more-adult-children-are-choosing-estrangement
- Published: 2026-11-03T13:30:00+00:00
- Read time: 2 min
- Topics: estrangement, parent-child, mental health, family dynamics, boundaries, reconciliation, adult children, parental responsibility
## Beatrice Sanders and Kat Schmidt
Beatrice Sanders, 69, a divorced mother, moved to Utah with her daughter Kat Schmidt, 30, after retiring.
## Estrangement Begins
Schmidt blocked Sanders' cell number and ended all contact after feeling responsible for her mother's happiness.
## Social Media Trends
Reddit forums for estranged adult children have over 30,000 weekly visitors, and a Facebook page for parents has 13,000 followers.
## Research on Estrangement
A Cornell survey found 27% of U.S. adults estranged from a close relative, including 17% from parents or children.
## Causes of Estrangement
Estrangement can result from abuse, mental illness, or conflicts over core beliefs and values.
## Richard Heller's Story
Richard Heller, 67, and his son, 39, have no contact for a decade after Heller's anger led to estrangement.
## Samantha's Perspective
Samantha, 35, says her father's anger as a child caused estrangement, but she understands his pain.
## Megan Gilligan's View
Megan Gilligan notes parents estranged from children over core beliefs, like a Catholic mother rejecting remarriage.
## Joshua Coleman's Insight
Joshua Coleman says traditional family roles have shifted, with children prioritizing mental health over family ties.
## Defensive Ignorance
Parents often dismiss detailed child messages as 'crazy' or 'exaggerated' to avoid uncomfortable truths.
## Reconciliation Efforts
Psychologists recommend amends letters and understanding both sides to rebuild relationships.
## Heller's Experience
Heller tried visiting his son but was blocked after saying he loved him and wanted to talk.
## Pew Research Findings
77% of parents say their relationship with adult children is excellent or very good, highlighting family closeness.
## Sanders' Future Plans
Sanders is moving to South Carolina to live with her brother due to health issues.
## Rebuilding Tips
Parents should respect boundaries, avoid stalking, and seek outside help to rebuild relationships.
## Key takeaway

Estrangement between parents and adult children is rising in visibility but not in rate, driven by mental health, boundaries, and changing family expectations.