From Cosmopolitan · Rachel Varina · · 1m 20s
Anorgasmia: What's Wrong With Your Orgasms?
Why can't you reach orgasm? Experts explain causes and fixes.
In brief
Why can't you reach orgasm? Experts explain causes and fixes. Anorgasmia, persistent difficulty reaching orgasm despite arousal, affects many people and requires medical or sexual therapy help. Originally reported by Cosmopolitan.
Quick answers
- What Is Anorgasmia?
- Anorgasmia is persistent or recurrent difficulty, delay, or inability to reach orgasm despite being aroused and receiving enough stimulation.
- What is the key takeaway from Anorgasmia: What's Wrong With Your Orgasms??
- Anorgasmia, persistent difficulty reaching orgasm despite arousal, affects many people and requires medical or sexual therapy help.
What Is Anorgasmia?
Anorgasmia is persistent or recurrent difficulty, delay, or inability to reach orgasm despite being aroused and receiving enough stimulation.
“Anorgasmia is the persistent or recurrent difficulty, delay, or inability to reach orgasm despite being aroused and receiving enough stimulation.”
Diagnosis Criteria
Symptoms must persist for at least six months and cause distress to be diagnosed as anorgasmia.
“For anorgasmia to be diagnosed, symptoms typically need to persist for at least six months and cause you distress.”
Types of Anorgasmia
Lifelong, generalized, or situational anorgasmia can occur, depending on when and how it happens.
“Anorgasmia can be lifelong, meaning you’ve always or almost always had difficulty reaching orgasm, or used to orgasm and now struggle to. It can also be generalized, meaning orgasm is difficult regardless of the situation, partner, or type of stimulation, or situational, meaning you can orgasm under some circumstances but not others.”
Normal Variation
Not being able to orgasm from vaginal penetration alone is a normal variation, not anorgasmia.
“The vast majority of women require direct or indirect clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm.”
Causes of Anorgasmia
Physical factors like diabetes, multiple sclerosis, pelvic floor dysfunction, and medications can cause anorgasmia.
“On the physical side, anything that affects your nerves, blood flow, hormones, or pelvic floor can potentially make orgasm more difficult.”
Mental and Relationship Factors
Stress, anxiety, depression, body-image concerns, past trauma, and relationship issues can hinder orgasms.
“Stress, anxiety, depression, performance pressure, body-image concerns, shame or guilt around sex, past sexual trauma, relationship conflict, and difficulty communicating what you want can all make it harder to reach orgasm.”
Stimulation Needs
You might need more clitoral stimulation, time to get aroused, or different touch types to reach orgasm.
“You’re just not getting the kind of stimulation you need to orgasm.”
Fixing It Yourself
Experiment with masturbation to find what works, then communicate it to your partner during sex.
“Explore different kinds of touch, pressure, speeds, and stimulation, and yes, absolutely bring in a vibrator or another sex toy if you want to.”
When to See a Doctor
Talk to a healthcare provider if anorgasmia causes distress or happens after medication changes.
“There’s no such thing as too early.”
Special Cases
If you have pelvic floor dysfunction or medication side effects, see a specialist for help.
“Depending on what’s going on, support might involve talking with a gynecologist or urologist, reviewing medications with your prescriber, working with a pelvic floor physical therapist, or seeing a sex therapist or counselor.”
The key point
Anorgasmia, persistent difficulty reaching orgasm despite arousal, affects many people and requires medical or sexual therapy help.
