From Slate Magazine · Rich Juzwiak · · 3m
Father of My Child Is Into Men. He Says We Can Get Married, On One Painful Condition.
Bi man's marriage condition: occasional male partners.
In brief
Bi man's marriage condition: occasional male partners. A woman asks if she should marry her bisexual partner who requires occasional male partners. Originally reported by Slate Magazine.
Unsure's question
A woman has been in a relationship with a bi man for three years and has a six-month-old child. She asks if she should marry him despite his condition of needing occasional male partners.
“He says he would still need to hook up with a guy once in a while.”
Jay's condition
Jay, the bi man, compares his need for occasional male partners to an itch he can't scratch himself and hasn't been with a guy in over a year.
“He likened it to 'an itch you can’t scratch yourself.'”
Unsure's dilemma
She wants Jay all to herself but has been waiting for him to be open to marriage, questioning if it's worth it to have a partner who occasionally dates men.
Advice on open marriage
The advice suggests letting Jay have his male partners before marriage to see how it affects their relationship, noting that some people might hate it while others find it harmless.
Marriage condition
The advice states that if she dislikes having a partner who dates men, she should consider whether to stay in the relationship, emphasizing that she shouldn't try to change him.
“You shouldn’t try to change him or even hope that he will change.”
Jay's commitment
Jay has been with the woman for three years and has a six-month-old child, but he says he needs occasional male partners for his sexual health.
Marriage advice
The advice recommends that she should be sure before getting married, as it could be a logistical headache to divorce if they decide to end the relationship.
“It’ll be much more of a logistical headache to get divorced than it would be to simply break up with a boyfriend.”
Open marriage
The advice suggests that she should let Jay have his male partners before marriage to see how it affects their relationship, noting that some people might hate it while others find it harmless.
Relationship status
The woman has been in a relationship with Jay for three years and has a six-month-old child, but he requires occasional male partners for his sexual health.
Marriage condition
Jay says he would still need to hook up with a guy once in a while, comparing it to an itch he can't scratch himself and hasn't been with a guy in over a year.
“He says he would still need to hook up with a guy once in a while.”
Unsure's question
A woman has been in a relationship with a bi man for three years and has a six-month-old child. She asks if she should marry him despite his condition of needing occasional male partners.
Advice on open marriage
The advice suggests letting Jay have his male partners before marriage to see how it affects their relationship, noting that some people might hate it while others find it harmless.
Marriage condition
Jay has been with the woman for three years and has a six-month-old child, but he says he needs occasional male partners for his sexual health.
Marriage advice
The advice recommends that she should be sure before getting married, as it could be a logistical headache to divorce if they decide to end the relationship.
“It’ll be much more of a logistical headache to get divorced than it would be to simply break up with a boyfriend.”
The short version
A woman asks if she should marry her bisexual partner who requires occasional male partners.
